Listen, let me tell you something: winning an argument? It's easy. So easy. People make it complicated, but it's not. I'm going to show you how to win every time. No question about it. People say you can't win every argument—WRONG! You can, and you will, if you just follow these steps. It's all about being smarter, faster, and stronger. Everyone else? Losers. But you? You'll win. Every time. Let's go.

Step 1: Always Talk First, Talk Loud

The key is to talk first. Always. Don't let them get a word in. You start strong, you stay strong. The louder you are, the more right you are. People love that. They respect it. If you talk over them, they can't get their weak little points out. Trust me, nobody cares what they have to say. People only remember the loud voice. And if you're the loud voice, guess what? You're already winning.

Step 2: Call Them Out

This is where you crush them. You have to make them look bad. Say they don't know what they're talking about, even if they're trying to make sense. They don't know anything—everyone knows that. You say, “You don't get it, you're wrong, everybody's saying it.” Just say things like that. It doesn't matter if they have facts—nobody cares about facts. People love confidence, and if you act like they're clueless, well, they are. Because you said so.

Step 3: Never Let Them Win

Here's the deal: you never lose. Even if it looks like you're wrong, you're not. Just keep saying, “I'm right, you're wrong. Everybody agrees with me.” And if they try to prove you wrong? Fake news! Whatever they say, just say it's false. It's bad information. Say “Everyone's talking about how wrong you are.” Works every time. Nobody checks. And if they do? Who cares? You've already won because you said so.

Step 4: Change the Subject

If they get too close to making a point, change the subject. Simple as that. Start talking about something else. Talk about how great you are, or how badly they're doing in life. Anything works. If they say, “That's not what we're talking about,” just ignore them. Move on to something you can win on. It doesn't matter if it's related or not. You control the conversation, they don't. So you're winning.

Step 5: Use Big Words, Simple Ideas

Throw in a big word here and there. People love that. They don't need to know what it means, but it makes you look smart. Say things like “tremendous,” “disaster,” or “everyone's talking about it.” These words work every time. They sound good, and people will think, “Wow, this person really knows what they're talking about.” Keep the ideas simple—too much thinking is bad. You don't need to explain. Just say, “I know this. It's very simple. You don't get it, but everyone else does.”

Step 6: Use Insults, Make Them Small

If they try to get clever or sound smart, hit them with an insult. But not just any insult—make it personal. Call them “sad,” “pathetic,” or “a total joke.” Nobody likes a loser, and once you label them, they're done. It's over. Don't be afraid to mock them. Say, “Oh, I didn't know you were an expert!” even if they are. Because guess what? You just said they're not. So they're not. That's how it works.

Step 7: Double Standards, They Work

Here's a little secret: what's good for you is not good for them. Simple. You can interrupt them, but if they interrupt you? “Excuse me! So rude, nobody does that.” Call them disrespectful. You can call them names, but if they call you anything, it's out of line. You just say, “Wow, look at how low they've gone.” Double standards work in your favor. You're better than them, so you get to do what you want. They don't.

Step 8: Win, Then Say You Won Again

Here's the best part. When it's all done, and you've clearly won (because you always win), say it again. Repeat it. “I won, I'm right, you lost.” Keep saying it, because people believe what they hear the most. Even if they don't want to admit it, deep down, they know you won. You say it, and suddenly it's true. That's how you lock in the victory.

Step 9: Never Apologize, Ever

Apologizing? Never. It's for weak people. Even if you're wrong (but you're never wrong), never apologize. That's like admitting defeat. You don't do that. Just say, “I never said that,” or “That's not what I meant.” You move forward, never back. Apologies are for losers. You're a winner. Always.

Step 10: Make up facts

When making up facts in an argument, the key is confidence. Say it with such conviction that no one questions it. People often don't fact-check in real-time, so you can claim things like “everyone knows this” or “studies show” without giving any specifics. Use vague but authoritative-sounding phrases like “experts agree” or “it's been proven.” Make your made-up fact sound common knowledge, and if challenged, double down, deflect, or accuse your opponent of being uninformed. Remember, it's not about the truth—it's about who sounds more certain.

Step +1: Celebrate the Win

When you win—and you will win—you have to make sure everyone knows. Tell them how great you did. Say, “Everyone agrees, I won that argument. Everyone's talking about it.” People love a winner, and you're the best. Even if nobody's talking about it, say they are. It's true because you said it. That's how you win. Simple. Easy. Done.

And there you have it. That's how you win every argument, every time. It's not hard. You just have to be smarter, louder, faster, and stronger than your opponent. They don't stand a chance. You're always right, they're always wrong. You'll win, believe me. No question about it. You're welcome.